Your peers are representation of where you could have ended up had you gone the same road they went down.
They are the fork in the road.. your peers could be representation of where you could end up right now or where you ended up because of who you followed when you were in junior high and High School.
In my 20s, I was lucky I hung out with people older than me who are already relatively successful in their own right. I was lucky I did not hang out with my actual peers. I hung out with a mishmash of people who had something to offer as far as knowledge and life experience and some of them are still on my Facebook to this day..
and many of them are extremely successful and they have beautiful families and a great life
And they helped me grow up
it is so weird to sit in this world I developed finishing up my purpose in life..
I watched the documentary on Hope Solo, the American Soccer Player who became under fire for her comments to the media and fighting for equal pay and I remember my Jr High School soccer team needed a goalie and I played excellent goalie during PE. I remember the jock chicks trying to get me to join the soccer team and even though my grades were Cs, I was still eligible to play, but my mother said no.
And you can best be sure I was extremely angry. I was so angry because I wanted to join the soccer team and there was nothing stopping me except for her.
So you see my anger was warranted I just didn't understand why she would stop me because even though my grades weren't b's they were still eligible to play soccer.
Maybe she didn't want to turn me into a jock. I don't blame her for that.
At 50 years old I now understand why.
She saved me from a lifetime of hell.. what happens to chicks who are jocks as children they turn into mothers and wives.. very few actually make it big.
So they destroy their body as a child and a young adult and they spend the rest of their lives trying to regain what was lost in their children.. and then they become a clone
I look back on what road I could have went down if I played goalie in Jr. High. Would have I been as "great" as Hope Solo or "get a scholarship to college? Could that have given me more incentive to do "better in school"?
I don't know... but I was meant for other things and I realize that now.
I guess I cannot complain because I ended up not part of the mainstream, which was probably the intention..
Once a girl or boy joins a sports team in school, their peers have more influence than the parents and that makes a lot of sense..
and when she said no to me cruising with the 9th grade chicks who I helped develop the Freshman float was also a source of anger because I could have been in the In Crowd. I could have been popular.
And so I was forced to hang out with girls who weren't as popular. And I wanted to be the best and I couldn't.
And I was also pretty. But I didn't have the freedom my popular peers had..
She didn't want to turn me into another High School clone part of The Breakfast Club.. where are these chicks now.
They're either still partying or they're a mother chasing their youth.. I still Google some people I used to be friends with back in the 90s when I was actually in a high school class. And I see where they are now and I see where I could have ended up
And once my peers have influence over me then it makes it harder for the parent to raise that child when the peers are in the persons ear as well as the parents.
I can see people getting pregnant or doing drugs and alcohol because of the peers getting together.
And Junior High is still very young and there was still high school to go that's four more years of peer pressure and peer influence..
My mother knew how dangerous my peers were to me and to my future which yeah I get it..
Many of my peers have children or had children very early. She knew how dangerous peers were to girls as well as boys and yeah early pregnancy is one of the outcomes when peers get a hold of each other.
I think I probably got lucky not graduating with my peers back then in the early earlier early 90s. I probably would have ended up pregnant with 10 kids or working at some job playing the game and dying in the game with no chance of getting out..
Getting locked into a family and raising children is a jail that's very difficult to escape because of stigma of trying to escape that jail is so pervasive people die in that jail or commit suicide because they can't handle the pressure or they are a victim of domestic violence because the partner can't handle the pressure..
Now watch these kids in junior high and High School dealing with peer pressure and aggressive sexual predators in the school hallways and young boys being bullied to death in the schoolyard not unlike the adults out there playing their games
It's one thing to get your ass kicked by a gang members because of juvenile hall and whatever it's another to have Insidious predatory tactics done to you by your peers who you have to graduate with, for years and years and years.
Boys and girls are broken down by their peers and then they end up as adults chasing their youth
And when you're broken down by your peers in high school people don't survive their high school years and they end up more than messed up later on and her children become a trophy of trauma and they have to deal with that for the rest of their life.
You can't escape that..
Peer pressure is probably the number one destroyer of a future. Especially when drugs and alcohol are all over the campuses as well as religion.
Any parent who has some kind of control over their kid knows how deadly the children's peers are to that kid's future.
And these kids are left to the streets out there and that's why they get early pregnancy and they don't have a chance.
There's no future for that mother or that child because it will take a lot for that mother to be successful despite what she had to deal with in her early twenties. She would need the state to raise her child for the most part..
Kudos to my mother
There was a method to her madness..
She did her job. She did her job so well I don't have to go back to the womb to get the safety people are dying to get when they keep their parents around. And since I'm not part of an actual family I'm not obligated to take care of them when they get old. They have people around them to do that. That's part of the privilege of my position. And my position is extremely non-traditional and most people will not get it. And that's why I was raised differently to show you we are entering into an adult centered world not a child-centered world anymore..
And so if your parents are not in the picture consider yourself lucky and pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.
If your children are not in your picture then you have to find a ways to make sure your future is secured in whatever outcome you choose for yourself.
It truly is not selfish taking care of yourself because at this point so many people are stretched so thin that's all they can do is take care of themselves and you can't fault them for that. Some people know their limits. Other people don't and they become the human sacrifice and they get paid very well for it..
Having a child locks you into a lifestyle that if your kid is not successful then you're not successful and you have to deal with the stigma. If your kid is suffering you have to end their suffering and sometimes they will die suddenly and people will blame you and sometimes you could be brought up on charges if your kid is starving. Having a child it's like taking on a liability with no true reward when you think about it.
It might seem like it because you get company but when something breaks down that's like having a puppy for 10-15 years and then you have to watch it deteriorate. Some people get the luxury to watch their children grow up and be who they are that you can be proud of but it's all a gamble. At this point during climate change everything is a gamble
In my opinion children should never be a payday or a representation of the success of the parent. Why would you force a child to be that type of representation for you?
If you're given the opportunity to just take care of yourself that's the universe giving you a way out. I'm serious. But if you truly feel you must belong to a family whether you develop your own or adopt somebody else's then you cannot complain about anything and you have to be a compliant.
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